The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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