Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
