Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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