batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
there is glitter all over my balls
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