Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
