...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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