i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
