My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I FOUND THE LEGS
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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