I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Randomize
