I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
