she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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