Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
