Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
