I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
