We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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