I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
