bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
