You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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