I love black thongs
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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