my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
