I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
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