Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
