You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
