I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
