all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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