But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
After tacos, we're chasing women.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
