Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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