"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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