I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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