This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
