is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
