Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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