Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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