Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
My pussy is not your playground.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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