Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
