im holly from the hills drunk
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
