how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize