Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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