What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
