did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
