I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
