Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
