He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
