The maid of honor just puked.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
