is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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