I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
