Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
