everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
