For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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