Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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